Hey K2 Kanakuk Friends,
Well, the
"Wisdom to Pass Down" post was pretty successful (it went viral...haha, kidding!) so as I replied on Facebook to my sorority 10 year reunion (don't do any math to figure out my age...just kidding, I don't get the whole don't ask women there age...I'm 30! Woo!) I thought about how special of a time it was. It is like no other time in life. I am not the person that looks back to college and says, "it was the best years of my life." If that were true, I would still be like a 13th year senior. It was an amazing time but I do pray I always love the exact stage of where I am TODAY.
I know a bit of folks that WERE campers are now in college so thought this could be helpful...or maybe not at all but you will get to laugh at me and find out where to buy the
ADORABLE sorority prints from Etsy.
Anyways, as I looked through the girls from my pledge class that had responded to the get together I was once again taken back to those days. The days when I was surrounded by 250 girls that were all at different points in their journey with the Lord. I was never super close to any of them as I rushed as a junior and therefore asked to not to have to live in the house but they are still connected to my heart. I know for me as I look back there are some little nuggets I just wish I would have realized more...
1. Picking a sorority is not about YOU or "go where you feel comfortable." This is the extreme opposite of being a believer is about. When you go through rush (and yes, rush is a big game) you need to not think "oh, where am I most comfortable," but "Lord where do you want to uncomfortably use my life to bring You glory?"
2. Be bold. Girls always tell me they started drinking b/c of the sorority life, pledging or what have you. Girls, if you tell the house you don't drink and won't drink they cannot force you to. If they do, it's not a good sorority. Put your foot down from the beginning. The first night after pledge day we all spent the night at the house. It was so awkward as I was so out of my comfort zone (I rushed as a junior literally b/c the Lord told me to in a communication class one day...random!) and we were all told to bring something that means a lot to us. (this story is not to toot my horn but to show you an example) So I brought my Bible. I knew it was a way for me to be very clear whose I was and what life I want to live. It would give people a glimpse of not just luke-warm christianity but this is the single most important thing in my life. So I was scared and shaky but I shared with each girl that my salvation in Jesus Christ was the most important thing to me. I think they knew from that point on that there would be no crazy hazing for that pledge, but yet I didn't miss out on anything.
3. Look around & See Past the Front. I do wish I would have been more intentional with people in my house in college. I was so busy building a stupid resume filled with meaningless successes that I missed just loving the girls that surrounded me. Just seeing the stories, hurts and hangups that needed Jesus or just encouragement. I didn't look past the perfect dresses for chapter nights or all the girls looking like they had a blast at the frat party or the girls that gossip about each other until that person would walk up...I so wish I would have looked past that and not ran from it but pressed into it to see the heart.
4. Make Memories. As a christian it does not mean you can't be in a sorority and do it right and well. You can. Study nights...take a cupcake break. Be the girl at the house on Friday night if someone needs a ride. Go get her. Go write your pledge trainer a note saying thanks and that you are praying for her. Ask girls you eat with every day at the house...how can I be praying for you? Be silly during Rush Work Week...keep perspective for the house. Make an 80's dance party in the 16 girl room in the house.
5. Bite your tongue and leave your judge hammer at home. Jesus was about love and grace. Let's say that you have that figured out and live life for the Lord. I hate to tell you but there might be those around you who it takes a bit to figure it out. I am not telling you "don't be bold" or to be lukewarm. But don't walk into your sorority house with tracks flying out your pants and your Bible smashin on their faces. Bite your tongue by not gossiping...how would you look any different if you are gossiping about others in your house? And don't judge, just love them with Jesus' love.
6. Share the gospel when the door is open. The hubs had a leadership guy that got to speak at this fraternity recruiting night #1. He was supposed to speak on the character of the house and the religious aspect (I'm guessing they wanted him to mention they have Bible studies for those interested). Well, this fellow ended up sharing the gospel and infusing Jesus to every recruit that walked in. When asked to maybe tone it down on the "Jesus" stuff, he answered no, he couldn't, and the leader who respects this guy said "okay."
7. Be fun. Be silly. Don't be all hoity toity stuck up weirdo judgy christian girl. Be joyful, be patient, be kind, be loving...Be Jesus. (although I am fully aware you AND I mess up tons...it's okay. own that and change)
8. Be involved. Help with things when asked. When a gal heading a committee needs volunteers...do it. Don't just sign up for the banner which is fun to make but help with something that shows your support of other girls in your house.
9. Really celebrate your sisters' accomplishments. I remember feeling in the room when we would all celebrate something in our chapter meetings but you could feel just jealously oozing from folks. Yuck. Be a girl that hugs a girl for getting best pledge or president or pledge trainer. Write them a note later to tell them congrats and that you will be praying for them. Rejoice...
10. Don't lose you! Don't go out on week 1 to the frat house knowing it's not a good situation. If you do, learn and get involved in a small group outside your house. Get accountability. Don't think you have to be the world driven "sorority girl." Be you, be different.
Well that's all my wisdom...and even those 10 things I'm sure not everyone would agree with. But there ya go. Take what you want and ignore the rest if you want.
Be awesome & Love Jesus,
kanakuk ashley robbins
ashley@kanakuk.com