Hey K2 Kanakuk Friends,
Coping is like a soap box for me (I do know what coping means but not the phrase "soap box"...hmm, interesting?). I, being a licensed professional (joke!), think I can solve the world if this generation could simply learn and execute how to cope...
Please don't get all huffy and start snorting like a rhinoceros about how it's Jesus...for me and this blog that is given. We need Jesus, grace and love...desperately. But even great kamp kids come through every summer and I walk away from conversations wondering why are they coping with _____ (fill in the blank) but doing the strangest and most illogical form of harm, thoughts or lifestyle choices. I mean horrible...sometime honestly so odd that I have to watch my facial expressions to you all...I get scared by it. I get all, "Jesus, come back please!" Somehow I think that coping has been lost in dealing with life and teaching this generation to do so. My mom tells me about some of her interactions with parents these days in the education world and it baffles me...truly! It's somehow never the child's fault in anything with papers, tests or quizzes...Have we yanked all chances for our child to cope with failure or hurt or not getting what they want...
I, by no means perfect, have already started to tell the littles (the ones that can understand me at this point) that they don't always get what they want. I continue and say "you should learn this about life now." The ways the enemy is showing you all to cope is just scary and horrific and harmful and filled with LIES. When you get left out, you take to drama queen role and get all crazy gossip girl. When you get a bad grade, you manipulate it to miscommunication of teacher student role or the teacher doesn't like you. When you get a broken heart, you don't go get ice cream and listen to Celine Dion (not that I did that, ever, really) but you desperately, and that is not a good desperate, hit the tweet airwaves and beg for him to come back or threaten that all life is lost for your soul.
Desperate souls need desperately a Savior to make them not weird desperate. Quote that folks...it's deep. To cope with hurt, fear, anxiety, loss, or whatever comes our way means we do it with authenticity...we lay in our mom's lap when a boy breaks our hearts and we cry. We tell our friend that is hurt our feelings to be left out on Friday when she invited everyone but you over and however she responds we move on in forgiving her whether she asks for it or not knowing she maybe isn't the friend you thought...side note: move on means you can still smile at her and be around her but you don't unfriend her publicly on instagram and unlike all her pics. See healthy coping versus unhealthy.
Please know I am not speaking to deep hurt from sexual abuse, loss of a parent, or deep scars. I worry that this generation puts not getting 200 likes on their new profile pic in the same category of these deep wounds because of the coping issue in our world. I always tell folks I think we all need some good counseling (not like the weird life coach stuff where they tell you to do whatever you feel and stupid statements like that) but good someone ask me great questions and remind me of Jesus, His love, His grace and His story for my life counseling.
Please...learn to cope. Learn to fail and do it well. Learn to embrace the bumps in your story and know that they hurt for a bit but they do heal. Learn that a bad day does not equate to a horrible life. It's just a bad day...
Be awesome & Love Jesus,
kanakuk ashley robbins
ashley@kanakuk.com